Last Sunday, Charlie got saved!
Even typing that feels big. Because it is!
It was something worth celebrating. One of those moments you want to hold onto because you know something important happened. A life turned toward Christ. A new beginning.
But then Monday came.
And the funny thing about getting saved on Sunday is that you still wake up Monday morning as yourself.
You still have bills. Kids still need you every second of the day. Bonnie's into everything. Your kids have demands, your spouse has demands.. Work can still be stressful. People can still hurt your feelings. Your temper doesn't magically disappear. Anxiety doesn't pack its bags and move out. Old habits don't suddenly forget your address.
And sometimes, I think that's the part of becoming a Christian that we don't talk about enough.
What happens after the altar? After that magical moment you had with God?
For Charlie, part of this first week has been wrestling with the feeling that people are watching him.
Do they think I'm serious?
Do they think I'm fake?
What if I lose my temper?
What if I say the wrong thing?
What kind of Christian does that make me?
And I imagine a lot of new Christians have quietly wondered the same thing.
Because once you've publicly said, I'm following Jesus, suddenly every failure can feel bigger.
You get angry, and shame whispers, See? Nothing changed.
You lose your patience, and shame says, Some Christian you are.
You have a bad day, and suddenly you're questioning something God never asked you to prove to everybody else in the first place.
But I've been thinking a lot about Romans 7.
Paul… the same Paul who wrote so much of the New Testament, describes this incredible struggle inside himself. He essentially says, I know what I want to do, yet I still find myself doing the very things I hate. (Romans 7:15–20)
Think about that.
This wasn't somebody who didn't love God.
This was somebody who loved God enough to be deeply bothered by the places in his life that still didn't look like Him.
And maybe that's an important distinction.
Struggling with sin isn't the same thing as being comfortable with it.
A Christian isn't someone who suddenly never falls.
A Christian is someone who has somewhere to turn when they do.
Paul eventually cries out:
“Who will rescue me from this body of death?”
And his answer isn't, I'll try harder. And it sure as heck ain't the people around us.
It isn't, I'll make everybody believe I'm a good Christian.
It isn't, I'll never mess up again.
His answer is Jesus Christ. (Romans 7:24–25)
And then comes Romans 8.
“There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1)
I think Charlie needs that right now.
Honestly, I think we all do.
Saul knew something about people doubting a changed man
I've also been thinking about Saul.
Before becoming Paul, Saul wasn't simply somebody with a questionable past. He persecuted Christians. Then Jesus met him on the road to Damascus and completely changed the direction of his life.
And do you know what happened afterward?
People didn't immediately trust him.
In Acts 9, when Saul tried to join the believers in Jerusalem, they were afraid of him because they didn't believe yet that he was really a disciple.
Can you imagine?
God had changed Saul's life, but other people hadn't caught up yet.
His salvation was real even while people questioned it.
Eventually, they saw the fruit. But Saul couldn't build his new life around convincing every person who doubted him.
Neither can Charlie.
Neither can any of us.
Salvation isn't graduation
I think sometimes we accidentally treat salvation like graduation when it's really the beginning of school.
You're not standing at the finish line saying, “Look what I've mastered.”
You're standing at the beginning saying, “Jesus, teach me how to follow You.”
Philippians 1:6 reminds us that the One who began a good work in us will continue that work.
Began.
That's important.
God isn't surprised that there's still work to do.
And becoming more like Christ happens in real life… not in some perfectly quiet Christian bubble.
For us, real life is four girls needing something at the same time. It's overstimulation. It's work stress. It's marriage. It's exhaustion. It's somebody losing their patience. It's apologizing. It's trying again. It's sitting down with our Bibles when the house finally gets quiet enough to hear ourselves think.
Sometimes growth might look less like never becoming angry and more like recognizing anger sooner.
Sometimes it's walking away instead of exploding.
Sometimes it's coming back and saying, “I shouldn't have handled that the way I did.”
Sometimes it's opening your Bible when shame tells you to hide from God.
Sometimes it's going back to church when embarrassment tells you everybody is judging you.
That's growth, too.
Our failures don't get the final word
We're going to fail.
I'm going to fail.
Charlie is going to fail.
Our children are going to watch both of us fail.
But maybe one of the greatest things we can show them isn't two parents who somehow became perfect Christians.
Maybe it's two parents who know what to do when they aren't.
Repent. Apologize. Forgive. Pray. Get back up. Keep following Jesus.
Proverbs 24:16 says that though the righteous fall, they rise again.
Our failures don't have to define us.
They can expose places that still need healing. They can humble us. They can teach us dependence on God. They can become places where Christ continues shaping us.
The mistake isn't the masterpiece.
God is still working on the person who made it.
So yes, last Sunday Charlie got saved.
And this Sunday, he's still Charlie. I'm still me.. and the world is still turning.
He's still learning. Still wrestling with his temper. Still figuring out what following Jesus looks like when work gets ugly, the house gets loud, anxiety kicks in, and somebody pushes exactly the wrong button.
And I'm still learning right beside him.
We aren't trying to build a family that looks perfect from the outside.
I want us to build one that knows where to run when things fall apart.
Because Christianity isn't pretending you never struggle.
It's knowing Who you're following in the middle of the struggle.
And maybe the testimony isn't only:
“Look who I became the day Jesus saved me.”
Maybe years from now, we'll also be able to look back and say:
“Look what Jesus patiently did with me after.”
“He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” — Philippians 1:6 ❤️
& Just a reminder that’s been on my heart lately: The more steps you take toward Jesus, the harder the enemy will try to pull you back. Don’t let the struggle convince you to stop. Keep walking toward Him. ❤️ And remember. Jesus always wins.
“Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.” — James 4:8
Love always,
Fowler homestead
